"Nine" Review, in brief

“Nine” has all the sex appeal money can buy. Penelope Cruz, clad in lacy lingerie, stretches her long legs over her head; Fergie howls and growls while she rolls around on the beach wearing little more than a shawl; even Dame Judi Dench squeezes into a corset.

But “Nine” loses the depth of the Maury Yeston, Arthur Kopit musical on which the movie is based by using famous faces – and bodies – instead of capable voices.

While Daniel Day-Lewis gives a passionate performance as Guido Contini, a filmmaker and philanderer with a bad case of writer’s block, he speak-sings through the score’s difficult moments, whispering the anguished high notes in “I Can’t Make This Movie” and shortening held notes, an interruption to Yeston’s melody lines. As Guido’s mistress Carla, Cruz delivers “A Call from the Vatican” using similar disappointing techniques, though her recording includes a dazzling high C, which only the sound mixers know the authenticity of.

Still, at least their songs are integral to the story of a man fighting for his craft and his women. Kate Hudson, playing a Vogue writer and Contini fan, sings the bossa nova-style “Cinema Italiano,” a song created just for the movie. In addition to sounding like a karaoke performance, the song has no bearing on the plot. Another new song, the burlesque number “Take It All” performed by Guido’s wife Louisa, played by Marion Cotillard, feels weak. It replaces the stage show’s “Be on Your Own,” a powerful declaration that Louisa is finally leaving Guido. “Be on Your Own” frees Louisa from marriage; “Take It All” frees her from clothing.

Only Fergie’s gritty version of “Be Italian,” her voice full and lusty, burns with the passion of which she sings – and her over-the-shoulder glances during the song’s tambourine dance are smoldering. She combines the name-recognition, talent and sex appeal producers obviously felt they needed to sell the movie. But, if all the material had the strength of “Be Italian,” she and Day-Lewis could have done that without Cruz, Cotillard or – especially – Hudson.

Tim Burton at MoMA

From Edward Scissorhands to Jack Skellington, the characters in many of Tim Burton’s films reflect the alienation he felt as a child in suburban Burbank, California. The Burton exhibit on display at the Museum of Modern Art echoes this sense of isolation through its content – one set of drawings is titled “Little Dead Riding Hood”– and in its placement in the same building as Monet.

Red-and-white-striped monsters created by a film director that does not consider himself an artist by trade may seem out of place in MoMA. But Burton’s skill in several media – an oil painting of a wolf howling at the moon recalls the swirls of “Starry Night” and detail-oriented pencil drawings of the Martian brain look more like finished pieces than sketches – should convince visitors otherwise.

Unfortunately, curators Ron Magliozzi, Jenny He and Rajendra Roy undermine the respect a MoMA exhibit demonstrates with poor organization of the artwork. Burton’s work seems, at first, to be divided chronologically, though there is little direction for visitors looking for progression in his work. Placards with years and descriptors about the mostly untitled works, correspond only haphazardly to where the pieces actually hung on the wall, and the full walls overwhelm instead of welcome.

After several walls of morbidly funny drawings with hand-written captions like “Whipping a cow for whipped cream,” another room changes the exhibit’s focus from Burton, the artist to Burton, Hollywood phenomenon. A platform displaying movie props, like the white sweater from “Ed Wood,” is essential for Burton’s cult following, as are the sketches of characters from “Batman,” “Sweeney Todd” and others that hang on the surrounding walls. However, the awe they inspire diminishes the disclosure of Burton’s never-before-seen art – and the creations of the lonely boy from Burbank continue being ignored.

My holiday movie hopes...dashed

Did it ever occur to anyone to cast singers in the movie adaption of "Nine?" That is, instead of pretty, famous actresses who just speak and breathe through some really wonderful melodies. Maury Yeston - are you still alive and allowing this? Allowing a cohesive - if a bit indulgent - musical to be butchered for the screen is painful each and every time it is done, but "Nine," I fear, could be the worst.

I plan on seeing the film when it comes out Christmas Day. Based on the snippets I'm previewing on iTunes right now, I might have to cook a goose other than the famed Christmas goose. Cinema needs something more than live theater as it loses a keep sense-ual element, I understand that. But the dark, gritty shots and cheesy added numbers like "Take it All" and "Cinema Italiano" in place of the heart-felt "Simple" and the decadence of "Grand Canal" probably won't play well to an audience familiar with the source material.

Daniel Day Lewis seems to be in his element - but of course he is. The man chooses his movies so carefully, there was no doubt he would be great as Guido. As for, well...the rest of the cast, I will remain skeptical. I (potentially scathing) review will follow!

Where are the Scissor Sisters when you need them?

Has any "American Idol" contestant ever come out with a CD that wasn't incredibly generic? After last season's upset - come on, no one saw Kris Allen winning - I expected Adam Lambert to be that exception. "For Your Entertainment," for the most part, isn't a reflection of his creativity from the show - particularly his single "For Your Entertainment."

The song could be any AutoTuned club singer backed by drum beats and synth. The lyrics are vapid - "you thought that I was soft and sweet/that an angel swept you off your feet/but I'm about to turn up the heat" - and the vocals unremarkable, a real disappointment after Lambert's renditions of U2's "One" and his performance with Queen. His high notes seem planned, a gimic rather than a talent. "Pick U Up," "Sure Fire Winners" and "Strut" follow suit. My favorite track, "If I Had You" doesn't deviate from the unoriginal pop formula the rest of the album follows, but it's a fun dance track - I just don't need 6 dance tracks. I wanted his album to have more depth - see a previous entry in which I embedded a video of singing 4 Non-Blones "What's Goin' On." The album seems to embody Lambert's AMA performance, playing more with fun and fame rather than true music, a sad thought considering the quality of his instrument.

Tegan and Sara's "Sainthood," on the other hand, builds nicely on their last two major albums, "The Con" and "So Jealous." The best track, "Hell" uses their typically melodic, but not necessarily major keyed, chorus structure and fast-talking verses. Creative rhymes - "I know you feel it to/These words gets over-used" - dispel critics continual dismissal of them into simple pop. These girls are intelligent, they feel deeply and they express well- it's not the clean and clear "So Jealous" nor is it the crunch of "The Con," but somewhere between. It's still hanging in my car stereo.

Rock Radio ignores day parts

Something about the Beach Boys makes me cry. Whether it be "Don't Worry Baby" or "God Only Knows," I'm all teary when I hear them. Play "Wouldn't It Be Nice" while a ship is going down, as in the new Philip Seymour Hoffman movie "Pirate Radio," and I'm a sopping mess for at least a few hours.

And that's the primary strength of the movie - the music. The songs are hung on a poorly developed story of pirate radio stations sitting in the North Sea in 1966, waiting to be made illegal by the British government (one of which is a formidable Kenneth Branaugh). There's a teenage boy looking to lose his virginity and accidentally comes across his hippie father, an over-sexed DJ named Big Dave and a wedding-that-wasn't, none of which is as compelling as hearing what radio jocks sounded like back then and jamming to The Who, The New Seekers and (as I mentioned) The Beach Boys. Murray from "Flight of the Concords" injects flashes of nut humor and Bill Nighy plays the exact same Brit he does in "Love Actually." The characters - besides Branaugh's dry role - give the movie spark.

I loved it so much, I decided to wear a dress with daises all over it today.

(Not really, but I did rock to some awesome tunes.)

Strangely enough, the class I TA for listened to a DJ from the '70s, I believe, the morning before I saw the movie. The same spirit of rebellion coursed through his words as did those of The Count (Hoffman). They - those behind the tunes spun before BOB FM and other pre-programmed stations - loved music and wanted to broadcast that personality with their favorite songs. I remember listening to the KISS 10 at 10 as a middle schooler; now I listen to my iTunes on shuffle all day. I don't miss the advertising, but I sometimes miss Janet Snyder in the morning. "Pirate Radio" makes me want to support stations again...but unless it's WERG 90.5, they probably don't play what I like anyway.

Losing Lea

Congratulations, Yankees fans. You won. But I'm glad you are no longer playing so I can watch "Glee."

The beginning of last night's episode was thrilling - the prospect of hearing Lea Michele sing "Defying Gravity?" So exciting for a theater nerd (like me). And she didn't disappoint - and neither did Kurt, my favorite character.

What has been disappointing is the almost complete loss of Lea Michele's talent otherwise. At the start of the season, she sang in every episode or had a temper tantrum or fantasized about Finn. Now, she hides behind the guise of no one liking her - even though, while annoying, she's not exactly unlikeable - and has been overshadowed by Quinn's pregnancy. I wrote in a previous post that it is the characters that keep "Glee" together. I revise that now. Lea Michele was one of the reasons I started watching the show and after two weeks without hearing her latest rendition of some famous song, that's what I really wanted to hear.

Some refreshing notes, too: Wheels singing Billy Idol. The tearful scene with Sue and her sister. Tina's admission to affecting her stutter (!).

Lea Michele is my favorite, musically, and I need more of her as a viewer. But the show is really stepping up to the plate with other character development, and I would probably keep watching even without her.

Come on, though. She's so made for "Defying Gravity!"

Go read someone else

It's probably obvious: I don't update as often as I did over the summer. I'm taking in more culture - theater especially - that I ever have, but I have not devoted enough time to writing about it here. Classes have my judgmental eye carefully crafting a piece - choosing a tone, seriously considering my verb choices - and that has taken some of the fun out of my spontaneous bouts of love for Sutton Foster.

So, until the freshman in my class need less help and I don't have to stare at HTML code for hours at a time, you should read: www.thelistomania.com. It's awesome writing (that I edit sometimes, I might add, so maybe I'm biased) - snappy, profane and full of the voice - about his 151 top songs of the '00s. Before you start thinking it's just some kid spouting off about Nickelback, know that he's been making lists like this for years and has a prolific knowledge of his subject matter. And that's all evident in the individual entries. He made me a jammin' mix CD a few weeks ago of Sigur Ros, Jenny Lewis, Chairlift and a bunch of other bands I absolutely will take notice of in the future. (Listen to Chairlift's "Bruises" and see if you don't tear up thinking about being a kid and being in love.) So the List acts as two things: First, he's a dude that knows a lot about music and has some great insight. Second, he makes you remember why you used to listen to Ted Leo on repeat. Ok, and third, the List will open your eyes to some artists you missed the first time through the decade.

www.thelistomania.com - Do it.